


Jolly Holidays

by Venstar



Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Holiday, M/M, Prompt Fill, oh no, whatever could be going on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:00:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28184301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Venstar/pseuds/Venstar
Summary: M solemnly swore never, ever, to let Moneypenny go on holiday ever again.
Relationships: James Bond/Q
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34
Collections: Mi6 Cafe Prompt Fills





	Jolly Holidays

M solemnly swore never, ever, to let Moneypenny go on holiday ever again.

She would sign a blood oath, swear to God, and on all that was holy or unholy if she managed to survive this week. Why oh why did she agree to Moneypenny taking a holiday? M studied her face in the mirror. Dear God she was going to need multiple trips to the spa to try and turn back all the wrinkles she had gained in just three short days. Why oh why had she agreed to let 007 be her personal assistant for that length of time? Oh. Well probably because of the umpteenth embassy he had blown up, the Swiss Guard he had just left broken in an Italian hospital, and the Cardinal’s secret daughter he had returned home with and had stashed away somewhere. M didn’t even want to know where. She rubbed her temples. And as if that wasn’t enough to make M scream.

Because there was also Q.

M slouched down into her chair. She needed a drink. Several in fact.

Q had read off a litany in his soft, elegant but oh so deadly voice aaaaaaaaallllllllll the things 007 had done to his precious equipment while out on assignment. He had ripped 007 up one way and the other several times. To make matters worse, he had done so while said agent was standing in the same room with him. M’s office. Therefore, M had nothing else to do but punish 007 for the misappropriation and misuse of equipment, and for some reason, punishing him with desk duty was the only thing she could think of, and since Moneypenny had just left on holiday, there was only one place she had available to put him in.

M sighed long and heavy one more time. Let’s not lie and say it would be her last.

007 seemed inordinately pleased to be home for the holidays and to be chained to M’s office. It had taken a minute for her to adjust to seeing him smiling at her from behind Moneypenny’s desk. Why he had even offered to get her a cup of coffee. She had shut the door on his face. When she had called for him, she had assumed he had managed to scarper off somewhere, putting in just enough effort to show up to say ‘see I can play along’ but no...he had answered the call and had waltzed right into her office with a tablet in hand.

Damn and blast.

She had patiently endured the first day of that until he began offering suggestions. After one brilliant suggestion too far, she had sent him on his way.

“You look as if you swallowed a lemon. Should I get you some tea to wash it down?”

“Get out.”

He had waltzed away, tossed his tablet on Moneypenny’s desk, and gone off to torment some other poor soul. She had eventually learned that it was in Q branch. Two days later, he showed back up behind Moneypenny’s desk. She glared at him as she passed by, unsure whether or not she was more upset to see him or that he had been absent from his post for that long. 

Wait. What was that?

She stopped at the entrance to her office and slowly turned. She studied him until he fidgeted.

“Something wrong, ma’am?”

A slow smile started on one side of her face. “Been enjoying your holiday?”

His brow furrowed. “It’s been passable.”

Her smile brightened. “Well, I’ll be sure to tell Q. He’ll be delighted to know that he’s been a passable form of entertainment for you.”

“Wot?”

She tapped the side of her neck. “You have something right there, dear.” She then pointed to Moneypenny’s desk. “And there.” It was a scrabble mug much like Q’s but with a J on it. “A His and His set I presume. My, my. I didn’t know you were into the smart ones.”

Bond didn’t bat an eye. “Well, they’re much better than the stupid ones.”

“I’m sure he’ll be delighted to know where he ranks on the...what was it you said? The passable side.”

Bond sighed. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“When should we expect a happy announcement.”

He smiled too brightly at her. “Why I dare say you would want us to file the shagging paperwork with you as soon as possible before word gets out.”

“Dear God. No. If you do that, then all the other agents will want a minion of their own and we can’t have that now, can we?”

“No, we don’t, do we. So I’ll keep Q all to myself and you keep the news about us all to yourself and the world of MI6 will continue on and the world will never know.”

M retreated into her office with one last remark. “Moneypenny would have filed her shagging paperwork immediately and not been afraid to hide it. Now, who is my first victim...I mean meeting with.”


End file.
